If I Didn’t Have Any Drama In My Life, What Would I Be Focusing On?

I recently purchased The Wild Unknown Tarot and I have fallen in love with its beauty and it's honesty. It has extended itself to me and said "Grab my hand". For me it's a deck of opportunity as much as it is a shadow deck. It sheds light on those things that I cling desperately too but it also offers meanings that are thought provoking and allow me to relax my grip and eventually let go altogether.

My first reading I did with this deck, I drew the 10 of Swords and that card gave me a metaphorical bitch slap across the face.

Is it possible that you love the backstabbing and drama too much to move forward without it? If not for the drama…what would you focus on?

That right there gave me something to focus on other than being desperate to eat shit. It gave me something constructive to sink my teeth into. Something to examine. I'll tell you what…I came up blank. I had noooo fucking idea what I would focus on.

Eventually I started sifting through possibilities and I was taken aback at how many of those possibilities sat in a space that was drama intensive. A lot of the focuses my mind was wandering too, you have to have a man of steel fucking backbone and an iron fist conviction to stave off all the hate and jealousy. It's fucking crazy. I felt like I had very few options to tap into, which is bullshit of course but that's what it felt like.

There is a seed that's starting to take form, I see glimpses of it but it's still kinda dream-like. I see myself walking among flowers, some look to be taller than me. I look very content in these surroundings. Very grounded, happy and balanced. My dreads have taken, they aren't the mess they are right now and I look really healthy. Most of all…I'm smiling. This seed gives me butterflies and the warm fuzzies. I feel like I'm on a long journey home. Like, I'm slowly awakening into the person I was meant to be rather than the one I allowed myself to become.

My stomach flinches in pain when I think about moving beyond this realm I currently sit in and that tells me I still have fears that need exorcising before the seed can truly take root and flourish. The 10 of Swords has quickly become my favourite card. It has presented me with a doorway. All I have to do is reach out and open it.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s